relationshiphealth

Relationship Health
Understanding, Building, and Maintaining Health Connections - Friendships, Intimate, Family, School, or Workplace

A relationship, whether it’s a friendship, an intimate partner, a family member, or a coworker, can significantly influence your emotional and physical well-being, as well as your overall quality of life. The impact of these connections depends largely on whether the relationship is healthy or unhealthy. Recognizing the key differences between the two is essential for maintaining positive relationships, supporting your mental health, and enhancing your overall wellness.

Healthy Relationships

Signs of a Healthy Relationship
In a healthy relationship, you should feel valued, respected, and supported.

1. Respecting Each Other's Boundaries
Partners acknowledge and honor each other's physical, emotional, and personal boundaries. They communicate openly about what is acceptable and what is not, and they respect each other's limits without pressure or judgment.

2. Feeling Secure and Content, Even During Time Apart
A healthy relationship allows both individuals to feel safe and happy whether they are spending time together or apart. They trust each other and do not feel anxious or insecure during periods of separation.

3. Treating Each Other with Kindness and Respect
Both partners show consideration, kindness, and respect in their words and actions. They value each other's feelings, opinions, and needs, and avoid contempt or dismissiveness.

4. Building Trust and Honesty
Trust is based on consistent honesty, transparency, and reliability. Partners can share their thoughts and feelings openly, knowing they will be accepted and not judged.

5. Embracing Healthy Disagreements
Differences and disagreements are natural. In a healthy relationship, conflicts are addressed calmly and respectfully, with a focus on understanding and resolution rather than blame or hostility.

6. Ensuring Safety and Emotional Support
Partners feel safe expressing themselves without fear of judgment or harm. They support each other's emotional well-being, providing comfort and encouragement during difficult times.

7. Communicating Openly and Honestly
Both individuals share their thoughts, feelings, and concerns honestly and listen actively. Open communication fosters understanding and helps prevent misunderstandings.

8. Supporting Each Other's Interests and Friendships
Healthy partners encourage each other's personal passions, hobbies, and friendships outside the relationship, recognizing that independence and social connections strengthen the bond.

9. Enjoying Shared Experiences and Quality Time
Spending meaningful time together, engaging in activities they both enjoy, helps build intimacy and positive memories that reinforce their connection.

10. Supporting Each Other's Personal Growth and Making Healthy Choices
Partners motivate each other to pursue personal goals and make decisions that promote well-being, growth, and happiness.

11. Making Collaborative Decisions Together
Major choices—such as plans for the future, finances, or living arrangements—are made jointly, respecting each other's opinions and working as a team.

12. Listening Actively to Each Other
Both partners genuinely pay attention when the other speaks, showing empathy and understanding without interrupting or dismissing their feelings.

Unhealthy Relationships

Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship
Unhealthy relationships can leave you feeling uncomfortable, hurt, and burdened with unnecessary responsibility. Here are some key warning signs:

1. Displays Jealousy or Possessiveness
Constant suspicion or controlling behavior, such as checking your phone, accusing you of infidelity, or not trusting your interactions with others, indicating insecurity or lack of respect.

2. Insists on Being in Control (see Power & Control)
One partner tries to dominate decisions, dictate your actions, or limit your independence, creating an imbalance of power in the relationship.

3. Demonstrates a Quick Temper
Frequent anger outbursts, yelling, or aggressive reactions that create a tense, unsafe environment.

4. Assumes They Know How You Feel Without Asking
Making judgments about your emotions or needs without open communication, which can dismiss your feelings and prevent honest dialogue.

5. Engages in Manipulation
Using guilt, blame, or lies to influence your decisions or feelings, often making you doubt yourself or feel responsible for problems.

6. Neglects Your Feelings
Ignoring or dismissing your emotional needs, making you feel undervalued or unimportant.

7. Blames You for Their Emotions or Actions
Refusing to take responsibility, instead accusing you of causing their anger, sadness, or frustration.

8. Dismisses Your Concerns as “Too Sensitive” or “Overreacting”
Invalidating your feelings and shutting down important conversations, which can erode trust and emotional safety.

9. Reacts Defensively to Criticism or Slights
Refusing to listen or consider feedback, often leading to arguments or hostility.

10. Struggles to Identify and Express Their Own Feelings
Difficulty understanding or communicating their emotions, which can lead to frustration and misunderstandings.

11. Avoids Discussions, Negotiations, or Compromises
Refusing to engage in problem-solving or to find mutually acceptable solutions, fostering conflict or emotional distance.

12. Holds onto Stereotypical Gender Roles
Expecting traditional roles that limit individual freedom and reinforce inequality.

13. Objectifies the Opposite Sex
Viewing or treating partners as objects or possessions rather than individuals with feelings and rights.

14. Makes Insulting or Demeaning Comments
Using language that belittles, mocks, or devalues you, damaging self-esteem.

15. Expects Unrealistic Behaviors or Standards from You
Demanding perfection or imposing unreasonable expectations that cause stress and resentment.

16. Relies on Alcohol, Drugs, or Other Substances to Cope
Using substances to manage stress or emotions, which can impair judgment and escalate conflicts.

17. Pressures You to Use Substances
Coercing or encouraging you to drink, take drugs, or engage in risky behaviors.

18. Exerts Pressure for Sexual Encounters
Forcing or manipulating you into intimacy without consent, or ignoring your comfort and boundaries.

19. Issues Threats Towards You, Your Pet, or Others
Using intimidation or threats to control or frighten you.

20. Has a History of Physical or Verbal Altercations
Engaging in violence or aggressive behaviors that threaten your safety.

21. Ridicules, Belittles, or Criticizes You
Degrading your personality, appearance, or abilities to undermine your confidence.

22. Uses Intimidation or Physical Force to Prevent You from Leaving
Employing threats, violence, or coercion to restrict your freedom or safety.

23. Follows you or shows up at unwanted times (stalking)

Need help?

If have have any of the signs of an "unhealthy" relationship, the following resources are available.

In immediate danger

Call 911
If you or someone is feeling hopeless, helpless, thinking of suicide, contact 988 Lifeline:
- Chat with Lifeline
- Call or text 988
- For Spanish speakers, call 988, then press 2 or visit Ayuda en Español: Lifeline
- For deaf/hard of hearing, dial 711, then 988
- For Veterans
  - Call 988, then press 1
  - Text 838255
  - Chat with Veterans Crisis Line

The Hotline

Call 800-799-7233
Text, "START" to 88788
Chat live

Love Is Respect

Call 866-331-9474
Text, "LOVEIS" to 22522
Chat live

Teen Line

Call 800-852-8336
Text, "TEEN" to 839863

Resources

Download a Handout on Healthy versus Unhealthy Relationships
Power and Control Wheel (Handout)
Additional Health Education Materials (Handouts)

Additional Relationship Risks and Prevention

Emotional and psychological abuse (verbal abuse)
Physical abuse
Sexual abuse